Unmotivated Students

"Loser! You're never going to get it, so why don't you just give up? You suck! You are so weak!"

These phrases popped around in my mind like popcorn seeds in a hot, greasy pan. After a very rough year, I had started slowly and eagerly, but each time I tried to exercise, I ended up in a pathetic pile of self-pity. I put forth my best effort again and again, but I never experienced success. So I became discouraged. I gave up.  I became unmotivated. When I was around others who spoke of their physical feats in the gym, I inwardly shrugged my shoulders and thought, "Well, la de da for them, but I'll never be able to do it anyway, so why even try?"

And then it hit me. This is the same thought process that our poor readers go through. They didn't start out being unmotivated, but after years of going to school and never experiencing success, they became discouraged. They gave up. They became unmotivated. When we have class discussions or take tests and the "good readers" always know the answers and get good grades, it's like rubbing their faces in their inability to comprehend what they read.

So then it becomes a question of what we can do to motivate our students. Yes, we get tired of the excuses and irritated with the lack of effort, but we must keep in mind that, at one point, years ago, our students were eager learners who put forth their best effort but didn't experience success. So what's the solution?

It is important to provide our unmotivated students with three things:

1. Constant encouragement and positive reinforcement- These precious young people must know that others believe in them. They need to repeatedly receive verbal praise and acknowledgement of what they CAN do in order to quiet the negative, self-deprecating thoughts floating around  in their heads. This encouragement needs to come from adults and peers alike. Students think that teachers are supposed to believe in them, but it becomes very powerful when their own classmates believe in them and encourage them as well.  
2. Examples of people who were struggling students but turned it around and experienced great levels of success- In order to believe that they can be successful, students must know that people who were previously in their shoes were successful. These examples can come from books, real-life encounters with older students, guest speakers, etc. Our students will start to think that if others could do it, then maybe, just maybe, they can too. 
3. Opportunities to be successful- This most likely means NOT starting these students with reading material at their current grade level, and that's ok. I understand when some say that providing a 7th grader with reading material at his or her current reading level isn't getting him or her ready for the state test at the end of the year. However, I contend that it is. The unmotivated are getting nothing out of simply sitting in the classroom taking up good space. If they are provided with opportunities to experience success, their academic self-esteem will grow, and eventually, they will start to believing that they can learn.

This process may be slow and frustrating. It might take a week. It might take a month. It might take the entire school year, but over time, our unmotivated students will experience success and become inspired to learn.  Will they pass the state test that same year? There is no guarantee that they will. However, the students will eventually believe in their ability to learn, which will lead to the motivation to be successful. Success will build upon success, and the students WILL experience academic improvement and growth.


As far as my exercise is concerned, I joined a social network in which I received daily encouragement. I also heard stories of others who had been out of shape but were able to get back to healthy. Most importantly, I was able to start a simple exercise program at my current fitness level that allowed me to experience some success. It wasn't anywhere near what a former collegiate athlete should be able to do, but it was a start. It was slow. It was simple. But it worked! Over time, I started believing that I could be successful and I became motivated once again.  May the same hold true for our precious students.

Are iPads (and Other Electronic Devices) Bad?

I guiltily glanced over at my daughter as I read this fantastic blog post by Renee Robinson. In her letter to her boys, she explains why she says "No" to electronics. Her purpose in writing was not to point the finger at parents who allow their children to use electronics, and she wasn't pointing out the evils of electronic devices. She was simply sharing her reasons for making the choice she made. However, as I read, I jumped into comparison mode. I thought, "Goodness, she is such a good mom while I'm sitting here on the computer letting Naomi play on the iPad." 

Naomi spending time on the iPad

 Once I took a deep breath and really focused on Renee's words, I realized that she made some very valid points, specifically, wanting to " give [her sons] the gift of true human connections...watch them discover the joys and wonders of the world...being comfortable with who they are...wanting their unique gifts from God to bloom...[and] being confident in themselves...". She treasures this short time that she has with them and doesn't want this time to be wasted with them plugged into electronic devices.

 When Naomi started talking, one of her first 30 words was iPad. (I thought it was adorable that she could express what she wanted at such an early age!) When she gets up in the morning or after a nap, she wants the iPad. Whenever she sees Mommy on the computer, she wants to sit next to me and use the iPad. The bottom line is that Naomi LOVES the iPad. Naomi uses the iPad while I work on lessons for school, clean the house, browse the internet, and work on my photography. (Most recently, it was editing the pictures I took for my sister's wedding.) All good things, yes? I have been thankful to carve out a few hours a day to do some things that I want to do while Naomi quietly occupies her time. This has been key in my summer survival at home!

It's so easy to fall into Mommy Comparison mode which is what happened when I was reading Renee's post, but I didn't want to do that. So after putting my reading aside and doing some thinking, I realized that I am NOT a bad mom who is messing up my child, but there is nothing wrong with being challenged by what I read and making changes in response to those challenges. (I don't want to make changes because it's what other moms are doing. I really just want to be the best mom that I can be and do what is in the best interest of my sweet Naomi.)

I thought about what Naomi does on the iPad. She easily goes to YouTube and enjoys watching Busy Beaver, Sesame Street, Kids TV, and other age-appropriate videos. These videos provide good, educational lessons that are a great tool for learning. She watches videos that I recorded of her doing things, which the therapist at the hospital told me was a good thing for her to do. She enjoys browsing through pictures, naming the people in them, and discussing what they are doing. Naomi also has her own page of apps which she navigates with ease. I have enjoyed seeing the learning that has taken place as a result of her time on the iPad.

Naomi's page of apps

I thought about my beautiful mother who, as a stay-at-home mom, raised 12 children in a day in age before electronic devices were so prevalent. 

My beautiful mother-I bet you didn't guess that she's in her 60's. Doesn't she look great?!

In an effort to keep her sanity, she would send us outside for an hour in the morning and an hour in the afternoon. She also took us to the library on a regular basis and made sure that we had plenty of books to read. We were required to have a certain amount of quiet time every day, and she taught us how to do crafts like cross-stitching and sewing. Brilliant!

I also thought about my sister-in-law over at Mountain Mama Teaching who uses media sticks with her boys so that they are limited in the amount of time they spend on their electronic devices. She still takes time to provide hands-on experiences for their young, developing minds and takes full responsibility for their learning. Limiting their use of media allows it to be a part of their lives, but not the all-consuming focus that it could easily become.

I thought about my sister Kim who was a kindergarten and first grade teacher but stopped teaching to be a stay-at-home mom and raise her three girls. She works on a tight budget and creates a TON of neat things for her children. She works hard to give them fun, educational experiences EVERY DAY, despite having recently returned to school to earn her Master's Degree.

My sister's three girls

I thought about my middle school students who need to know how to use electronic devices, but also need critical thinking and good communication skills. As electronic devices have become more prevalent, I have noticed that there seems to be something lacking in this area. (I am no scientist, have done no research, and don't know if one is the cause of the other, but there is definitely a positive correlation between the two.)

Based on these things, I decided that, for my daughter and me, the use of the  iPad (and other electronic devices) isn't bad, but it needs to be done in moderation and as a TOOL for learning. It is not to be the end-all, be-all, and it is not to take the place of spending time together. So this week, I greatly reduced Naomi's media time. Each day we went on some kind of outing. Naomi had some independent play time before our story time and quiet time, and then we completed activities TOGETHER in the afternoon and evening. (Thank you, Pinterest!) I must say that the following truths have become evident:

1. When we are engaged in our activities, Naomi doesn't ask for the iPad.
2. There are several apps for some of the activities we do, but by completing the activities together, with hands-on materials, the learning is taken even further.
3. Naomi and I have created priceless memories together, and we both have a LOT of fun!
4. Once I return to work in the fall, I will have only a few hours with Naomi each day, so I really want to do a better job of working with her to shape her mind and development.
5. Renee Robinson was right. I have seen Naomi develop human connections, and it's been my pleasure to observe her as she discovers the joys and wonders of the world. This time is short and precious, and I want to spend more of it together.

I kept a photo journal of our activities over the past week. Here are some of the highlights of our time together. Enjoy!

Climbing at the park-Look at the development
of those gross motor skills!

Driving at the park-Always fun
to pretend

                 

Learning to balance while walking across the bridge-
Gross motor development

Naomi wanted to wear her red shoes to the park this day

               

Making a new friend at the Play Place in the Mall
Human interactions don't take place on the iPad

Playing in the Sandbox at Grandma and Grandpa's house
Regular visits to Grandma and Grandpa's house are a must.

Mommy and Naomi taking a pizza break
at Bellabos

Making pizza in the pretend pizzeria at Bellabos

           

Water play at home

I wasn't expecting this to happen!

             

Splashing!

Independent play with Puppy

Independent play with Puppy

Playing Baby Doctor

An adapted version of Memory-Naomi just matches
the cards with them already face up

                   

Coloring!

Writing with sidewalk chalk

Making blue play dough
 (Naomi picked the color!)

                   

Counting game with the play dough and skittles

                   

Pretending the play dough is a cookie

Bowling!

Lining up for the shot

                   

A scratch, but we'll get it next time!

Visiting a lady whose significant other
recently passed away

Naomi knows her name and asks to
go to her house almost every day that we
are outside.

                       

Bursting bubbles

Thank you, Renee, for writing such a thoughtful letter to your boys. It really challenged me to change the way that I do some things with my daughter. The memories we have created are priceless, and so yes, like you, this has become more for me than for her!

What I've Learned from my Daughter

I am, by choice, a busy person. I enjoy finding productive things to do to fill my time. I bounce from one activity to the next, and often wish that I could go without sleep so that I could get even more done. The problem with this is that I push myself too hard, rarely taking time to relax, and that never ends well.

Now that I am on summer vacation, I've been able to spend quite a bit of time with Naomi, my 19-month old daughter. As I've observed her, I've noticed a few things:

1. She takes time to smell the flowers...literally. When we go for a walk or are in an area where there are flowers, she takes time to notice their color and fragrance. She often tells me what color they are and gives me an "mmmmm" to show that they smell good.

 2. She stops to notice the beauty of things around her. If there's water nearby, Naomi will want to stop, look, and listen. If there are puddles on the ground, she'll repeatedly jump and splash in them. She thoroughly enjoys life without worrying about what needs to be done next.

 3. When we sit down to eat, she takes her time to complete her meal. It may take her 45 minutes, but that is ok with her. She isn't in a hurry to move to the next thing , nor is she thinking about all that needs to get done. She truly enjoys her meal (especially if it's pizza or french fries). Sometimes she eats a little, gets down to play, and returns to her meal, but she never rushes when she eats.

I, on the other hand, am almost ways in a hurry. I zip from one thing to the next, packing my day with an impossible to-do list, rushing from one thing to the next trying to get it all done. I rarely take time to relish the moment or notice the beauty of things around me. When I am working on one thing, my mind is going fifty miles an hour, thinking of the other 2 or 3 or gazillion things I need/want to do.  I just want to finish one task so that I can move on to the next. This often leaves me stressed, overwhelmed, and disappointed that I didn't get more done.

Now that I've been spending a considerable amount of time with Naomi, I am challenging myself to slow down and smell the flowers. Will you join me in this challenge?

A Disappointing Start

My teacher friends and I diligently created a reading program that we knew our middle school students would love. We were going to show clips from a movie in conjunction with reading the book. Students would delve into the text, improve upon their reading comprehension, and stretch their minds as they engaged in shared inquiry. We had the movie. We had the books. We had the audio.

And we waited....

And waited...

And one student showed up. ONE.

I was absolutely crushed. Like every other teacher, I understood the importance of summer reading in order to prevent the summer slide. I knew that the 45 students selected for the program could possibly be reading at grade level (as measured by the Scholastic Reading Inventory) at the beginning of the 2014-2015 school year since they were just slightly below grade level at the end of the 2013-2014 school year. I knew that they would greatly benefit from the expertise of us teachers who were running the program and would maybe-just maybe-fall in love with reading (and pick up a book on their own!)

However, when one student showed up, it took the wind right out of my sails. I run into this problem of wanting my students to succeed more than they want it for themselves every year. And I don't know how to solve this problem. I don't know how to build intrinsic motivation in my middle school students so that they value education. They are so smart and have all the potential in the world, but they have to have the desire to work. Me having the desire for them is just not enough.

My colleagues and I spent our time calling the homes of every child who was supposed to be in our summer reading program, and we had a better turnout today. Out of the 45 students who were invited, 8 showed up. So we vigorously worked with these 8 students, and it was GREAT! Do I wish more students would have come? Absolutely. Can I force students to give up 3 hours a week to work on their reading? No I can't. So I need to stop getting upset over what I can't control and work hard to help those who want the help.

But I can still hope...

Naomi Wasn't Supposed to Be Born-Part 3 of 3

Read Part 1 here.
Read Part 2 here.

"Ben! I'm bleeding!" I screamed as I looked at the blood-stained sheets on my bed.

 It was August 27, 2012 at 3:00 a.m., I was 25 weeks pregnant, and the unbelievable was happening.

Here I am at 20 weeks-5 weeks before my world came crashing down.

 The new school year had started on August 22, 2012 and I was happy to return to work after a restful summer vacation. During my doctor's appointment on August 23, 2012, I mentioned that I was still having some pain, and Dr. Sherritt said that this would be the case because my baby, (that I now knew was a girl) was getting bigger and the fibroids were taking up a tremendous amount of space. So during those first three days of school, I sucked up the pain and did what I needed to do. I am ashamed to admit that I did NOT comply with the restrictions that had been placed on me, and to this day, I still partially blame myself for the events that would unfold.

Each time that I went to the bathroom, I always checked to make sure there wasn't any blood, as I knew the risks associated with my condition. My bladder had grown weak from the pressure of my ever-expanding uterus, so it wasn't uncommon to feel a little moisture "down there" if I coughed or sneezed. During the night of August 26th and into August 27th, I had tossed and turned with little relief from the pain. I had already gone to the bathroom a few times, so when I coughed around 2:30 a.m. and felt a little moisture, I didn't think much of it. However, as I dosed in and out of a fitful sleep, something just didn't seem right. I dragged my tired, hurting body out of bed and made my way to the bathroom without turning on the light. I thought the moisture had a slightly pink tinge to it, so I rushed back to the bedroom and checked the sheets.

And that's when my world came crashing down.

My husband (a night-owl who was still up) heard my scared explanation and raced up the stairs to the bedroom. He immediately called the doctor and explained my situation. As we waited for the doctor to call back I called my parents, and my dad answered. His smooth, confident voice helped me calm down as he reminded me of what we had prayed-that I would give birth to a healthy baby girl. During our conversation, the doctor called and said to get me to the hospital. Ben quickly ushered me to the car and drove me to St. Mary's Hospital in Hobart, IN. During triage, the nurse asked for a urine sample, but when I sat on the toilet, blood begin to pour from my body at an astounding rate. The nursing staff helped me into a wheelchair and got me into a room as quickly as possible. When I asked them what was happening, they looked at me with concern in their eyes and said, "We don't know."

 Dr. Sherritt quickly arrived and I was put on a drug to try and stop the bleeding and contractions that the nurses determined I was having. (With this being my first pregnancy, I didn't know what contractions felt like, and I had had pain throughout the entire pregnancy, so I didn't realize that this pain was what was later diagnosed as preterm labor.) However, the first drug didn't work, so another was tried. And then another. The doctors collaborating on my case wanted to move me to Porter Regional Hospital just in case my daughter was born early (as St. Mary's doesn't have a NICU), but my condition wasn't stable enough for me to go anywhere. Finally, around 5:00 p.m., the doctors decided that it would be better to move me as opposed to having a baby born so early and needing transport, so I was sent, via ambulance, to Porter Regional Hospital.

My hospital room at Porter Regional Hospital

The first week was awful. I was on heavy medication that left me feeling very woozy, and I wasn't allowed to get out of bed for any reason. Dr. Sherritt said that we were going to try and get me to 28 weeks before my sweet baby girl came because she'd have a greater chance of survival.

By the second week, the bleeding had completely stopped, but I was still having contractions. During this time, I was finally allowed out of bed to go to the bathroom and shower.

A couple of weeks before my C-Section-Miraculously, I made it to 36.5 weeks!

After that, the days and weeks start to blur together. For a total of 78 days, I sat in that hospital room. I experienced a plethora of emotions, from disbelief, to sadness, to anger, and finally acceptance. I set a daily routine for myself and waited through the endless days. The most important lesson that I learned was to truly wait upon the Lord. He was in complete control of the situation, and I really learned to be quiet and just wait.

My family and friends made sure that I had a visitor at least once a day, and that helped keep my spirits up. People called, prayed, sent flowers, cards, books, candy, and other goodies to cheer me up. They rejoiced with me daily as Naomi stayed in utero. Dr. Sherritt came to see me every morning (unless he was off, in which case Dr. Kurt Wiese stopped by). They would sit and talk to me for awhile, regardless of the number of other patients they had to see. Much to the surprise of the doctors, I made it to 36.5 weeks. Dr. Sherritt told me that at first, neither he nor specialist Dr. Ismail thought that I'd be able to carry a child to term. But like Dr. Isamil said during the horrific 10th week of my pregnancy, "Sometimes God has a different plan."

Moments before I was taken into surgery; Ben was with me every step of the way.

Finally, on November 14, 2012, my sweet Naomi was born. She spent a couple of days in the NICU due to some breathing problems, but was soon given a clean bill of health. After spending four more days in the hospital, I was finally able to return home. I spent a grand total of 82 days in Porter Regional Hospital, but when I look at my sweet Naomi, I know that every day was worth it.

Holding my sweet girl for the first time

Visiting my love in the NICU-she's so tiny!

Kangroo care-we spent countless hours like this. We both loved every one of them. She was ready for kangroo care to end much sooner than I was!

God is so good!

Today, Naomi is a happy, healthy toddler who touches the lives of just about everyone she meets. 

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